Drew Oakley
April 2026
Most of us didn’t learn about love from Jesus—we learned it from a mix of culture, church assumptions, and whatever we experienced growing up. And because of that, we’re trying to build relationships on a foundation that feels normal… but isn’t actually strong enough to carry what we expect from it.
Love-ology | Week 1: What Is Love, Really?
Everybody wants a love that lasts… but what if the version of love most of us believe in isn’t strong enough to actually hold the kind of relationships we want?
In Week 1 of Love-ology, we step back from surface-level advice and ask a deeper question: What is love, really?
Because before we talk about dating, marriage, communication, or conflict—we have to make sure we’re building on something strong enough to last.
The truth is, most of us didn’t learn love from a single, reliable source. We picked it up from culture, experiences, relationships, and assumptions. And while that version of love may feel normal… it might not be strong enough for real life.
This message will challenge you to rethink love from the ground up—not just who you choose, but what you believe love actually is.
Key Thought:
We all want love that lasts, but most of us were never taught how to build it.
Scripture References:
1 Corinthians 13
1 John 4:7–12
John 13:34–35
Why You Love the Way You Do | Love-ology Week 2 | Relationship Patterns Explained | Christian Relationship Teaching
Why do you react the way you do in relationships? Why do the same patterns keep showing up—no matter who you’re with?
In Week 2 of Love-ology, we uncover a powerful truth: the way you love isn’t random—it’s been formed over time.
Your instincts, emotional reactions, and relationship patterns didn’t just appear… they were shaped by your experiences, environment, and influences.
That’s why what comes out of you under pressure feels automatic.
It’s not just what you do—it’s what’s been formed in you.
The good news? Scripture shows that two different ways of loving are at work in every person—and they lead to very different outcomes.
If you want different relationships, it’s not just about trying harder… it’s about becoming different.
Key Thought:
You don’t just choose how you love—you’ve been formed into a way of loving.
In This Message:
• Why your relationship patterns feel automatic
• How formation shapes your instincts and reactions
• The difference between flesh-driven love and Spirit-shaped love
• How to begin changing the way you love from the inside out
Scripture References:
Song of Songs 6:7-8
Epistle of James 4:1–2
Why Your Relationships Keep Breaking Down | Love-ology Week 3 | Christian Relationship Advice | Why Love Fails
Why do you keep reacting in ways you said you wouldn’t?
Why do the same arguments, frustrations, and patterns keep showing up?
In Week 3 of Love-ology, we confront a hard truth: knowing how to love isn’t the same as actually loving well.
Most people aren’t lacking information.
We know we should be patient. We know we should listen. We know we shouldn’t overreact.
And yet—under pressure—we still do the opposite.
That gap isn’t random. It reveals something deeper.
The struggle inside of you doesn’t stay hidden—it shows up in your relationships.
And that’s why the same cycles keep repeating.
Because at some point, you have to face this:
trying harder won’t fix what formation hasn’t changed.
If you’ve ever felt stuck between who you want to be and how you actually respond, this message will help you understand why—and what needs to change.
Key Thought:
You can’t build a lasting relationship on an unformed version of love.
In This Message:
• Why good intentions aren’t enough for healthy relationships
• The internal struggle behind repeated conflict
• Why effort alone won’t change your relationship patterns
• How transformation—not just trying harder—changes the way you love
Scripture References:
Colossians 3:12-14
Ephesians 4:17-22